Things Your Therapist Wishes You Knew

Photo by Giammarco Boscaro on Unsplash‍ ‍

It's okay to disagree with me.

Actually, I'd argue it's necessary. If something I say doesn't land, feels off, or just isn't true to your experience — say so. I'm working with the information you give me, and I'm not always right. A good therapist doesn't need you to manage their feelings. Push back.

You don't have to cry.

Therapy isn't measured in tears. Some of the most meaningful sessions I've had were mostly conversation. Some people process emotionally, some intellectually, some through humor. All of it counts.

You don't need a crisis to come to therapy.

You're allowed to show up before things fall apart. In fact, that's kind of the ideal. Therapy as maintenance — not emergency repair — is underrated.

The first session is almost never representative.

First sessions are a little awkward. There's paperwork, there's history-taking, there's the general weirdness of talking to a stranger about your inner life. Give it a few sessions before you decide if it's working.

Progress is nonlinear — and that's not a red flag.

A hard week in the middle of good work isn't a sign you're back to square one. It's usually a sign something real is being stirred up. Bad weeks are data, not failure.

Ghosting your therapist is more common than you think.

I'd genuinely rather you tell me it's not working than disappear. No guilt, no drama — just a conversation. We can troubleshoot, adjust, or help you find someone who's a better fit. Therapists are used to endings. We just prefer honest ones.

More posts in this series coming soon. If there's something you've always wondered about how therapy actually works, I'd love to hear it.